Pure Heaven Flash Fiction

Pure Heaven


It was nine inches long!
I could hardly get my mouth around it, much less swallow it.
It was plumped up, hot, sizzling, mouth watering!
I had to have it though.
Licking my lips, my mouth surrounded it, as if it belonged there.
I bit into it!

Boy, that was a great hot dog!


SCROLL DOWN FOR HAPPY DANCE FRIDAY

pEACE

HAPPY DANCE FRIDAY!

Happy Dance Friday and have a wonderful weekend ;-)

Peace

Variety

Fixing My Life In 5 Easy Courses

I have been tagged byJeff to do the following meme. Thank you Jeff ;-0

The rules are as follows:

Devise a list of 5-10 courses you would take to fix your life. (If only it were that simple!)

It's more fun to be in classes with friends, so include one class from the person who tagged you that you'd also like to take. Tag five other people.

Ok, here's mine:

1) HOW TO GET OUT OF BED RUNNING

I'm the type of person that needs lots of time to awaken. I get up almost two hours before I must leave for work in the morning (yeah I know I'm nuts). I have my coffee, read and post some blogs, walk my little snot dog, come back and do a little meditation or some yoga, and then I'm ready to face the world! In other words, I'm slow getting started!

2) SMILE YOU DUMB BASTARDS, LIFE IS NOT THAT SERIOUS

I work in a a rather conservative department in my organization. Everyone is always soooo serious! A great majority of them are real ass kissers too. And then there's me. I try so very hard to bring a little humor in the rather serious kinds of situations we deal with, and most of the time all I get are those "looks", as if I'm an alien. In a way, I am. So I'd like to take this course to them.

3) HOW TO CREATE GREEN VEGETABLES THAT TASTE LIKE CHOCOLATE

In spite of the fact that I try really hard to eat right, when all is said and done, I'm a real junk food addict! It's not that I don't like vegetables, I do! But they're just not something I sit and crave when I'm thinking about what to eat!

4) KNIFE THROWING (with Jeff) (this will help him with his fear of balloons).

I'm not crazy! Hear me out on this. Jeff will stand in front of a large wall, his body outlined with multi-colored balloons. I will throw knives at the balloons, making every effort to miss Jeff and pop the balloons! Jeff will be so thankful that I popped the balloons and not him, he will go away worshipping balloons, instead of fearing them! Will also help me with my coordination, cause I can be such the klutz.

5)ACTING/SINGING/PIANO LESSONS

I was destined to become a rock star, (if only in my mind), in spite of the fact that I send people away screaming when I sing (and not in a good way), I can't read music and can only play "Oh Susanna" on the piano.But it's been my dream to be able to do all those things.

6) I'd have to join Jeff in his FOOT IN MOUTH REMOVAL course....especially needed at work, while I'm trying my hardest to get them to smile!

I'm sure there's many, many more courses I could take but I'll leave it at these to begin with. I'm going to tag: Boondoggled (Deb); Michael C.; Open Grove Claudia; Reflecting Pool; and Buffalo Dick. :-)

Peace

PJ' Time

PJ Time

The Crankster and The CEO passsed the PJ Award along to me and this is what they said:

Crankster, being a prankster thought my pajamas might look like this: " Odat's pajamas are warm, fuzzy, and embracing. They're multi-layered, made out of flannel, and perfect for curling up with a cup of hot chocolate. They come in warm, friendly colors and are embroidered with monkies. " Aww ain't that cute...I like to think of myself as warm and fuzzy, but with a little bit of glitz or some cleavage showing...lol.

I found these monkey pj's on the web...i just may order them! ;-) hehe.
And The CEO who is just so very sweet (or on drugs, hehe) said this: "So I am nominating the really classy blogs............Odat, puts out high quality, wonderful material seven days a week. Odat is a staple of mental health. Remember this when the Bloggie Nominations come around, please." (mental health??????????????????) oh well....I'll take it where I can get it!

These are two blogs that I've been reading probably since I started to blog. Both are well written and have a lot to offer the world. I thank them both for being part of my blog experience and for being good friends!

So......with warm and fuzzy feelings I'm passing this award along to Patti and Miss Bee, both of whom have become warm and fuzzy friends; and to Matt-Man whose robe is a sight for sore eyes and his blog always gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling ;-0

Peace

Happy Monkey Monday

HAPPY MONKEY MONDAY!!

(Roger, of Idaho Daily Photos was so sweet to make this picture for me. Go visit his picture blog, he's so talented with his photos!)

It's going to be tough getting back into the swing (pun intended) of things, after being off for a week from work. So in order to start off our Monday with a smile here's little joke to keep ya laughing:

Students at a local school were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" &"My Life" by Bill Clinton.

One student turned in the following book report,with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report.

Titanic:.... cost - $29.99

Clinton :..... cost - $29.99

Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read

Clinton :..... Over 3 hours to read

Titanic:.... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, andsubsequent catastrophe.

Clinton :..... The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, andsubsequent catastrophe.

Titanic:..... Jack is a starving artist.

Clinton :..... Bill is a bullshit artist.

Titanic:.... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.

Clinton :..... Ditto for Bill.

Titanic:..... During the ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.

Clinton :..... Ditto for Monica.

Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.

Clinton :..... Let's not go there.

Titanic:...... Rose gets to keep her jewelry

Clinton :.... Monica' s forced to return her gifts.

Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.

Clinton :..... Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

Titanic:...... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.

Clinton :..... Monica....ooh, let's not go there, either.

Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.

Clinton :..... Bill goes home to Hilary - basically the same thing.

Peace
__________________________________________________

Crazy recipe

Small rant:
Had to go back and forth to Motor Vehcles five times this week before they got it right!!!! I flipped out the last time I went and asked for a supervisor. Turns out the clerk was inputting the information the wrong way into the computer. It blew my brain circuits while I was there. I felt like I was in a Sienfeld episode! She just couldn't give me a logical explanation as to why all the information she was asking for was needed. All I got was "that's the way it's done"! Well, noooo it isn't, as she found out when her supervisor went over to her and showed her! Damn stupid people! Ok done.








I lifted this from Crazy Working Mom. Thought is was cute.


What's your recipe???

Kathleen - 1/4 cup of trustworthiness - a pound of humor - a gallon of crazy Boil together and serve.

'What is your personality recipe?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Peace

Happy Dance Friday and Flash Friday Fiction in 55 Words

Happy Dance Friday.....I'm unable to post a video this week...so I'm conceding to Sarge Charlie as the winner! ;-) He always does a warm up for my Happy Dance. Go see his! Funny stuff.

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving and are enjoying a relaxing day today...I had a wonderful one. And I didn't even overeat for a change...At least I don't have that turkey/pie/icecream/eggnog/popcorn/etc hangover today.

I'm now participating in 55 Flash Fiction Friday, set up by Mike , the originator of the Writer's Experiment (see link on my list). It tells a story in 55 words. Here's my first:

A Brother

He was on top of the world, but he couldn't see that.
He was so high, he fell off and tumbled into the depths of hell, where he stayed.
He tried a few times to climb out, but he never made it back.
Now we'll never see his smiling face again.

He drowned in alchohol.

Peace

Happy Turkey Day (Almost) ;-)

May your stuffing be tasty

May your turkey plump,

May your potatoes and gravy

Have never a lump.

May your yams be delicious

And your pies take the prize,

And may your Thanksgiving dinner

Stay off your thighs!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

(I'll probably be back on Friday or Saturday. I've not visited a lot of you in the past few days because I'm at a dial up location and time is just not on my side to wait for all the downloads.)

Peace

Pet Stuff

To all Pet Owners

To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.

Dear Dogs and Cats:The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. Theother dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a pawprint in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim forit becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, and try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:

1 They live here. You don't.

2. If you don' t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it 'fur'nature.)

3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less

2. Don't ask for money all the time

3. Are easier to train

4. Normally come when called

5. Never ask to drive the car

6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends

7. Don't smoke or drink

8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions

9. Don't want to wear your clothes

10. Don't need a 'gazillion' dollars for college.

And finally,

11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Gratitude List:

1) Animals

2) Babies, cause they make me smile.

3) Moms

4) Dads

5) Grammas

Peace

Happy Monkey Monday/My Tat

I'm not looking at work this week....(I'm on vacation!!!) well at least I'm off from work, I'll be doing things around the house. But still, it sure beats working at work, I mean, ya know? :-)

Here's my butterfly....tatoo.

Gratitude list:

1) Coffee!

2) Warm quilts.

3) Monkeys

4) Sleeping in

5) Soft pillows.

Peace

Gratitude

It's almost Thanksgiving Day and because I've gotten all caught up with what's going on "out there" I've almost forgotten about what is going on here "in my heart". Remember how I used to do a "Five things I'm Grateful For" list everyday? In honor of Thanksgiving I'm going to begin that again. I need to. It helps. I've got so many things to be grateful for and I don't want to forget that.

Albert Schweitzer:
At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person.Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.

Buddha:
Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful.

Marcel Proust:
Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.

My gratitude list:
1) Friends and family who have stuck by me thru good times and bad.
2) The comforts of home...having a roof over my head and a good meal to eat.
3) The ability to get up in the morning, putting my two feet on the floor and greeting the day!
4) Sunrises and sunsets.
5) My lil Snot dog :-)

Peace

Do you love your lips????

Happy Dance Friday!!!

Peace

Test Time!

You Are a Chocolate Chip Cookie

Traditional and conservative, most people find you comforting. You're friendly and easy to get to know. This makes you very popular - without even trying!

What Kind of Cookie Are You?

I think they got this one wrong...I'm anything but traditional or conservative, but the rest is true hehe.

You Should Get A Butterfly Tattoo

Sweet and sassy For you, tattoos are a thing of beauty - not toughness

What Tattoo Should You Get?

I took this test because I got my first tatoo last summer, on a whim. And I did get a butterfly!

Hmmm.

Peace

Awards!!!!!!

I've received the following awards from two people here in blogland that have become good and fast friends. Like everyone I've met in the the past two years I've been blogging they are special and their blogs are not only entertaining but make me smile and laugh out loud at times and sometimes even make me think, aaarrggh!

Mike was kind enough to pass this one along:

Patti, my new blogging friend from my neighboring state of Connecticut passed this one along:

Thank you, my friends!

In keeping the friendships going I'd like to pass these along to my blogging idol, Deb, of Boondoggled fame. She's the one who got me to start blogging almost two years ago! She loved to blog and was always off reading blogs when I was looking for her. I couldn't never understand the attraction of this "thing" called blogging. I just didn't have time for this nonsense, I told her. One day, I did it! And it's been going ever since. So I have her to thank for getting to know all you great folks. And I thank her for that!

Peace

My Day @ Work In Pictures

Walking to the office. (walking in NYC is like driving, it's got it's own rhythm. Altho the area I work in is not so overcrowded with pedestrians, you've got to learn to go with the flow.)

My view from my office....lovely, isn't it?....(but at least I have a window and can see the sun.)

My messy desk. (If I don't see what I need to work on, I forget about it..which is why I have so many files out) Yes we do have computers but my line of work is one where paper "proofs" are always needed.

Peace

Happy Monkey Monday/Veterans Day

Don't forget...

Hug a vet!

(so sayeth the happy monkey).

Happy Veterans Day!

Peace

The Rest of Him?

I have only one question:

Peace

Happy Dance Friday

Happy Dance Friday! Have a wonderful weekend.

Peace

Flight of Ideas

You would think that I, (The -one -who -talks -a -lot (my American Indian name) would have no trouble posting here today. I've got nothing. Nada. Nil. And I figured that if I started typing that an idea would come to me. Have no ideas either. After all it's five am in the morning for crying out loud.

Are you wondering why I get up so early? I thought so. Hey there's an idea. I'll tell you.

I used to go to the gym. There was a very nice one in the office building in NJ where I "used" to work. I'd get up at 4:30Am..jump into my gym clothes, take my work clothes with me and off I'd go to arrive at the gym at 5AM. I'm a morning person so this didn't bother me and working out before made me feel really good all day.

Two years ago, my position was moved over to NYC. No gym! Yet I still get up early. Now I read blogs. and although I love all you guys it just doesn't induce those endorphins like the gym used to. Oh you induce something....just don't know what to call it....blogaphins??? Yeah, that may be it. And I do go to work with a warm and fuzzy feeling as a result.....Thanks for that!

And I wish I could do the tango! (I wonder where that came from?)

Peace

Dona Nobis Pacem

It's Blog Blast for Peace Day!

Mimi, Queen of Memes started this entire movement singlehandedly, and it's grown and has reached every corner of the universe and probably beyond....I think I saw an alien peace globe go by yesterday, as a matter of fact.

There'll be lots of postings today about peace. Peace of mind, peace on earth, peace, not war. Whatever you perceive it to be. As we're all unique persons, so too will be our conceptions of what peace means to each one of us.

My "peace" starts within. If I'm not at peace with myself, my world will reflect that. So I work hard at maintaining an inner calmness, first and foremost. When my world gets out of sync and things are not exactly as I expected them to be, I look inside and see what's going on there and if I can, take care of it. So too should be the way of the world. If only "they" would or could get rid of the hatred in "their" hearts (and you can insert anyone for "they") maybe the world could be a better place. Imagine that!

John Lennon:
Imagine all the people living life in peace. You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope someday you'll join us, and the world will live as one.t's up to each one of us to make that happen.

Indira Gandhi:
You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.

Jimi Hendrix:
When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.

Martin Luther King, Jr.:
One day we must come to see that peace is not merely a distant goal we seek, but that it is a means by which we arrive at that goal. We must pursue peaceful ends through peaceful means.

Better than a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace.
Buddha (560-483 B.C.)

All we are saying is give peace a chance.
John Lennon (1940-1980)

P E A C E !

It's all I got.

Desk flowers this week.

Peace

Happy Monkey Monday!

“If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)

Happy Monday!

Peace

Funny Ringtones.

Some fun ring tones I may use to annoy my co workers...but then again, they annoy me too so I just may forget it.....have a listen:


Create free ringtones at Phonezoo


Create free ringtones at Phonezoo


Create free ringtones at Phonezoo

Create free ringtones at Phonezoo

Saturday Sillies

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember .....

1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called "Ministers Do More Than Lay People."

2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.

3. The difference between the Pope and your boss...the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.

4. My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone.

5. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.

6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.

7. It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.

8. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.

9. My next house will have no kitchen - just vending machines and a large trash can.

10. A blonde said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid."

11. I'm so depressed. My doctor refused to write me a prescription for Viagra. He said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building.

12. My neighbor was bitten by a stray rabid dog. I went to see how he was and found him writing frantically on a piece of paper. I told him rabies could be treated, and he didn't have to worry about a Will. He said, "Will? What Will? I'm making a list of the people I want to bite."

13. Definition of a teenager? God's punishment for enjoying sex.

14. As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way

Peace

Happy Dance Friday

Happy Dance Friday!!! You may not think this video is about dancing...but it is, really. The dance of "puppy" love!!! hehe.




Peace
Have a wonderdful weekend!

Just Some Idle Thoughts

I've got to go to an all day seminar today. It should be interesting. But then again, they're usually not. I'd rather be in my office so I get can access to some blogs during the day. (is that addiction?) ( nah....It's just something I've gotten used to and has become part of my routine. (I could always use my blackberry if I really, really had to. However, since it's company issued I try not to do personal "stuff" on it. You never know when Big Brother is watching!). They say part of addiction is deniel. Ut oh, I may be in trouble.

Another thought I've been having lately is I'm getting tired of blogging. I think we all go throught that. I did once already. I may have to take a vacation soon. I've been doing this for almost two years and during that time I've gotten to know so many people! I've had my share of laughs and tears and feel good moments. I've even met four of you! I'd like to meet all of you too. We should have a bloggers convention. Maybe I'll organize one some day. Would you come?

Ok, gotta run. I've got to get in extra early because I have a little further to travel today.

Have a good one.

Peace