Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain!

Friday, November 21, 2008

A Quickie



Snotdog and I are alive and well and have been renovating the house.It's been keeping me real busy..... but I'm taking a break from it until after the holidays. I'm happy with the way it's turning out! In the meantime.......

AMAZINGLY YET SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1. IF YOU'RE CHOKING ON AN ICE CUBE, SIMPLY POUR A CUP OF BOILING WATER
DOWN YOUR THROAT. PRESTO! THE BLOCKAGE WILL INSTANTLY REMOVE ITSELF.
2. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE
ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.
3. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT - USE
THE SINK.
4. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR
A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE
A TIMER.
5. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM
ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
6. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
7. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T
MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE
DUCT TAPE.
8. REMEMBER - EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.
9. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.
DAILY THOUGHT: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR
ANYTHING, BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE
STAIRS.
----------
Peace

13 comments:

Ian said...

Hi Odat! :)

katherine. said...

I've considered five.

good to see you! happy thanksgiving !

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Hahaha! It's like you know me.

Akelamalu said...

Great to see you back Odat!

LOL simple but effective remedies!

Lois Grebowski said...

Odat, love those remedies. Actually a lot of them make sense! LOL!

buffalodick said...

Funny stuff! I see you haven't lost it...

Loving Annie said...

Heheh. You made me laugh first thing this morning, Odat !

Looking forward to seeing pictures of the renovations after the holidays are over !

The CEO said...

Happy Thanksgiving, it's good seeing you. Thank you. Monty

crazy working mom said...

Well, hello there friend! I hope all is well with you. :)

Thanks for the tips. I'll keep the ice cube one mind should I ever need it! Happy Weekend.

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

Hi honey. Do we get pictures when the house is done? That would be cool.

I love all the great advice too. Why didn't I think of some of these?

Have a great day and holiday season. Big hug and lotsa lovies. :)

Patti said...

Hi Odat!
Great tips you shared here.

Hope you and Snotdog have a wonderful Thanksgiving. ;-)

citizen of the world said...

If you've been following these health tips, then I can't understand how you are still alive and well! But glad to hear from you anyway.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

These are great. I feel so much healthier already.

Which Slinky can I throw down the stairs first?