Monday, June 14, 2010
This comes from 2 maths teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. Experience.
Here is a little something someone sent me that is indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me Laugh Out Loud.
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this:
What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
AND, look how far arse kissing will take you..
1+18+19+5+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 122%
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, its the Bullshit and Arse kissing that will put you over the top.
Sunday, June 06, 2010
Sunday, May 23, 2010
and then an extraordinary thing happened! I saw Martini. She was sitting with a dog handler from the animal rescue group in my area. She looked as tho she was going to cry and was shaking so hard she was a blur. Apparently her so-called owner had just come in and dropped her off and left!!!
Now, I usually have the ability to walk past all the dogs up for adoption. I usually look around and say hi and continue on my way. After all I have two dogs and I'd be out of my effing mind to get another dog! Well, consider me out of my mind. I took Martini home.
Martini (I call her Tini) is a 7 year old female pug dog! I agreed to become her foster Mom for the time being, but I have a funny lil feeling I'll be keeping her. She is just tooooo good! She follows me all over the place, sits on my lap, eats like a lil piggie, and has got the sweetest personality I ever saw.
Spud and Tank took an instant liking to her also! She looks a like like Spud!
I haven't had the chance to get pics yet, but I want to take all three of them together and then I'll post it.
I really need my head examined!!! :-)
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Saturday, April 24, 2010
CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM
One day I had lunch with some friends. Jim, a short, balding golfer type about 80 years old, came along with them---all in all, a pleasant bunch.
When the menus were presented, we ordered salads, sandwiches, and soups, except for Jim who said, "Ice Cream, please. Two scoops, chocolate.
I wasn't sure my ears heard right, and the others were aghast. "Along with heated apple pie," Jim added, completely unabashed.
We tried to act quite nonchalant, as if people did this all the time.. But when our orders were brought out, I didn't enjoy mine.
I couldn't take my eyes off Jim as his pie a-la-mode went down. The other guys couldn't believe it. They ate their lunches silently and grinned.
The next time I went out to eat, I called and invited Jim. I lunched on white meat tuna. He ordered a parfait.
I smiled. He asked if he amused me.
I answered, "Yes, you do, but also you confuse me.
How come you order rich desserts, while I feel I must be sensible? He laughed and said "I'm tasting all that is Possible.
I try to eat the food I need, and do the things I should. But life's so short, my friend, I hate missing out on something good.
This year I realized how old I was. (He grinned) I haven't been this old before."
"So, before I die, I've got to try those things that for years I had ignored.
I haven't smelled all the flowers yet. There are too many trout streams I haven't fished. There's more fudge sundaes to wolf down and kites to be flown overhead.
There are too many golf courses I haven't played. I've not laughed at all the jokes. I've missed a lot of sporting events and potato chips and cokes.
I want to wade again in water and feel ocean spray on my face. I want to sit in a country church once more and thank God for His grace.
I want peanut butter every day spread on my morning toast. I want un-timed long distance calls to the folks I love the most.
I haven't cried at all the movies yet, or walked in the morning rain. I need to feel wind on my face. I want to be in love again.
So, if I choose to have dessert, instead of having dinner, then should I die before night fall, I'd say I died a winner, because I missed out on nothing. I filled my heart's desire. I had that final chocolate mousse before my life expired.."
With that, I called the waitress over.. "I've changed my mind, " I said. "I want what he is having, only add some more whipped cream!"
Be mindful that happiness isn't based on possessions, power, or prestige, but on relationships with people we like and respect. Remember that while money talks, CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM SINGS!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Have you ever wondered why people blog? Neither have I. But.....I was just thinking why I started...and how it evolved and really, how it died. I started this blog in 2005. I was going through a little rough period in life and figured this was a good way to vent. But I wound up liking this world and liking the people who lived here and wrote here. I even became good friends with a few of you and met some of you too. I just wrote stream of consciousness type "stuff"....mostly silly things. Now, I do not consider myself a creative writer or a comedian or even a little talented in anything to do with writing....but I wrote and carried on and got silly and looked forward to seeing everyone and reading what you wrote every day. I blogged daily for a good long time.
Now, tho, so many things have happened. I retired, hub went to heaven. I got lost for period of time. Then I came back from that edge of darkness, different. It's like I look back on this blog and see someone else must of written it. Weird. But anyhoo, the life I lead today is a good one. I wouldn't change anything (cept maybe having hub back)....I'm happy, content and look forward to every day I wake up to and am grateful for every day that I get. It's really indescribable. But it lives here, in my heart. And for some reason, I just don't feel the need to blog every single day, so I stop in every once in a while...look around...drop some words to say hello....it's enough for me
Thursday, March 18, 2010
The 4th Wedding
fourth wedding ---- at age 84!!!
The reporter asked what her new husband-to-be did for a living and she
replied that he was a funeral director.
That made the reporter curious to know what her three previous husbands'
occupations had been.
She had to think for a bit, but then she remembered that she had married a
banker in her twenties, a circus ringmaster in her forties, and a preacher
in her sixties.
The reporter asked why in the world she had married four men with such
wildly diverse interests in life.
"Oh, that's easy," she replied.
"I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready and
four to go."
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards.
The little boy asked why he wore his collar backwards.
The man, who was a priest, said, 'I am a Father.'
The little boy replied, 'My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that.'
The priest looked up from his book and answered, ''I am the Father of many.'
The boy said, ''My has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn't wear his collar that way!'
The priest, getting impatient, said. 'I am the Father of hundreds', and went back to reading his book.
The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, "Maybe you should wear a condom, and put your pants on backwards instead of your collar."
Thursday, February 25, 2010
I am from trees growing out of concrete, from bottled milk deliveries, black and white TV and Irish stew. I am from the rail road room,three story house, noisy, neighborly, with summer breezes blowing through the screens tossing the curtains over my face, cooling the house.
I am from the tomato plants, rose bushes and swing sets in the back yard, the small patch of grass, cool under my feet.
I am from large Sunday dinners, pranksters and beer drinkers, from the Irish with their brogues and the Germans with their beer.
I am from those who don't know how to stop talking, laughing, crying and praying.
From the fear of the bogey man in the closet and Daddy's bedtime stories and brothers who made me eat worms.
I am from a variety of religions, yet, calling none of them my own. My spirit is one with nature.
I'm from the northeast, corned beef, sauerbraten and lasagna.
From the the mailman and the waitress who fell in love quickly and loved to dance and laugh, the grandmother who bought me nice clothes, the father with curly hair, the other grandmother who disliked Mom because she was Republican!
I am from the black and white wedding picture that now hangs on the wall of my mom's nursing home room, the urn of ashes on the fire place, the songs that still ring loud in my heart. The memories are what I have, some bad, but mostly good as I see their smiling faces in my mind and still feel their love in my heart. That's what keeps them alive, the memories.
Where are you from?
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Rick was in NYC for the National Dog Show and we met up for lunch. I've been reading Rick for a few years now and his blog is just so informative and upbeat and he has two of the most adorable dogs and one of the most unique cats you ever saw....check his blog out!!
Rick also blazed the trail for me when I went to Greece...I went thru my google reader the week before I left and noticed he was posting from a cruise thru the Greek Isles!!! So I asked him to call me when he got back to tell me about the hot spots to visit. He did and I went and it was one of the most beautiful trips I've been on.
Rick is just as I pictured him to be...he's sweet, friendly, and has a great sense of humor. Thanks for lunch Rick!!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Things I said I'd never do and did:
Buy an Ipod.
Go on Facebook.
Get an SUV.
All these things require learning new skills...I thought I was done with that when I retired. Lol.
But I'm having fun with them. So now when I hear myself saying "I'll never do that...." I should watch out.
Wednesday, January 06, 2010
- The are people born between 1946 and 1959.
- Generation X, are people born between 1960 and 1979.
- Generation Y, are people born between 1980 and 2000
Why do we call the last group Generation Y? (I never did know).
Recently a cartoonist explained it very eloquently below....
And I learned something new today!