Sunday, September 30, 2007
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Friday, September 28, 2007
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
You teased me once and I loved it.
I want to feel that chill,
It's like my drug.
Stop making me sweat!
That's all over now, go away.
I want to feel the breezes,
Come throught my window.
Fall, Fall, where did you go?
Come back to me.
I'm begging you....
Please???? I need you!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Monday, September 24, 2007
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Friday, September 21, 2007
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
No, this is not a delusion I had when my fever was 103, it was a subject of an actual conversation I had with a "friend". It started out by her telling me that she was getting her dog shaved. I pictured the poor thing bald and thought maybe he should have some piercings to go with his hairless look, so to be more "in" and stuff. This led to the question of dogs having belly buttons at all. When you think about it, they should, shouldn't they? But when I looked at little Snot dog's belly, no belly button there. But they do have them! They apparently stitch up the umbilical cord "button hole" on dogs right after they're born and if you look close enough you can see a little scar there. (I wonder why they don't do that on humans. Wouldn't we all look better?)
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Monday, September 17, 2007
I hope you all had a nice weekend. I didn't! I got food poisoning Friday night and have been in bed since then...I've never been sooo sick in my life ;-(
I'll be back to my effervescent self soon (I hope).
Sunday, September 16, 2007
7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mum! My favorite!
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
11pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!
Day 483 of my captivity...
My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture.
Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must remember to try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, that did not work according to plan...
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies." I must learn what this is and how I may use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit.
The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.
But I have patience, I can wait
Friday, September 14, 2007
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Monday, September 10, 2007
I thought the following would be appropriate for Monkey Monday:
My New Lincoln
I bought a new Lincoln MKX and returned to the dealer the next day because I couldn't get the radio to work. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated.
"Nelson," the salesman said to the radio. The Radio replied, "Ricky or Willie?" "Willie!" he continued and "On The Road Again" came from the speakers. Then he said, "Ray Charles!", and in an instant "Georgia On My Mind" replaced Willie Nelson.
I drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time I'd say, "Beethoven," I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, "Beatles," I'd get one of their awesome songs.
Yesterday, a couple ran a red light and nearly creamed my new car, but I swerved in time to avoid them. I yelled, "Ass Holes!" Immediately the French National Anthem began to play, sung by Jane Fonda and Barbara Streisand, backed up by Michael Moore and The Dixie Chicks, with John Kerry on guitar, Al Gore on drums, Dan Rather on harmonica, Nancy Pelosi on tambourine, Harry Reid on spoons, Bill Clinton on sax and Ted Kennedy on scotch.
Damn , I LOVE this car!
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Saturday, September 08, 2007
Friday, September 07, 2007
Thursday, September 06, 2007
And it keeps me from blogging hard too....I really have no interest in putting anything on my blog ..(not that there's much of anything there to begin with ...hahahaha).... Enjoy the cartoon and the song...and have a great day.
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
Doing a happy dance cause I'm off from work today!!! Here's some things to keep you busy from dogs to underwear! Who could ask for more! :-) Have a great day!
|You Are a Boston Terrier Puppy|
Aggressive, wild, and rambunctious.
Deep down, you're just a cuddle monster.
|What Your Underwear Says About You|
You enjoy wearing nice underwear, even if it comes at a hefty price tag.
You're comfortable in your own skin - and don't care to impress anyone.
Monday, September 03, 2007
Sunday, September 02, 2007
Thank you Fall.
Saturday, September 01, 2007
Both of them are stars and nice too!!! It's a pleasure to have such great blog buddies....Thank you both! ;-)
And to leave you laughing, some puns to ponder:
- Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
- A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
- I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
- Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.