Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain!

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Men/Women


Do you ever wonder what the differences are between the sexes?

Here's some thoughts.


MONEY
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.

ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that... is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS
Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats..

FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does..

NATURAL
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

AND FINALLY
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, jack asses, and pigs, the husband askedsarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."


Peace

Gratitude List:

1) Blog buddies

2) Long walks on nice days

3) Fresh flowers on my desk

4) Laughter

5) Mom





14 comments:

139887123 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sunrunner said...

Good list!

Meloncutter said...

Somewhere in here, I feel as if I have been insulted. But I just can't quite put my finger on it.

Hmmmmmm.....


Later Y'alll

SGT DUB said...

Odat, I love cats,
they taste like chicken

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

hi odat. how are you honey? i have something to tell you. now don't be mad, okay? the other day when i was in here (snooping) looking around i think i MAY HAVE taken your diary with me and i MAY HAVE left it somewhere else. now i don't exactly know where it might be. you see, i have asked everyone where i visited and no one will fess up to finding it. sigh... i only read that one part, honest. you know the one? well, now honey, if it hits the lost and found in the blogesphere i'll being it right back. (and if any of you out there have this BRING IT BACK!) now honey, you're not mad, are you? i have cake..... bee

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

odat? that was me that deleted the comment, i couldn't find my glasses either. sorry. anyway, i think melon has it and he won't tell, okay?

Michael C said...

A hysterical joke, but it seems to portray the women as getting the upper hand. HMMMMMMMMMMMMM??
;-)

Odat said...

Sun, Thanks!

Melon, Ya reckon? lol

Sgt. Shame on you!!!

Bee, It's ok...my life is an open book anyway...so who cares if everyone knows I like the big vanilla dickmans with coffee, not milk!!!

michael,
Don't we always? hehe

Peace

ian said...

You can't have hair like mine and not deteriorate during the night. And sometimes during the day, too.

I've never kicked a cat. But when she bites at me, I'll try.

Ian

Claudia said...

Funny!! I like the last one

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Yeah!!

My Heart Runneth Over said...

Hysterical! ~M

Lizza said...

Hahaha! Funny, but true. :-)