Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain!

Thursday, May 24, 2007

OH NOOOOO!!!!

I'm a little upset about this, although my lil Snot dog is not part of the recall.

Dog Breeders Issue Massive Recall Of 07 Pugs

The Onion



Dog Breeders Issue Massive Recall Of '07 Pugs



WASHINGTON, DC—While pug owners are accustomed to chronic dog malfunction, the latest animals are prone to more than the usual overheating, seizures, and joint failure.

WASHINGTON, DC—Citing centuries of quality- control issues that have resulted in chronic unreliability, cascading system failures, and even total unit shutdown, the American Pug Breeders Association announced a recall Monday of all pugs produced between February 2006 and the present day.


We apologize wholeheartedly to any and all owners of the 2007 pug," APBA director Betty McAndrews said at a press conference, standing before a table where 10 defective pugs were displayed. "While pug owners are accustomed to dog malfunction, the latest animals are prone to more problems than just the usual joint failures, overheating, seizures, chronic respiratory defects, and inability to breed without assistance. The latest model pug is simply not in any way a viable dog."
According to the APBA's online recall notice, pugs produced in the specified period are at "moderate to high risk" for convulsive respiratory failure, soft palate suppuration, corneal ulcers leading to sudden deliquescence of the eyeballs, catastrophic lung collapse, ingrown ribs, diabetes, patellar luxation, encephalitis, Lou Gehrig's pug's disease, impacted hips, neck dysplasia, tracheal fissures, morbid obesity, cranial arthritis, and leakage of the anal sacs. In addition, due to strong allergic reactions to almost all medications, 97 percent of pugs are untreatable.

Recalled Pugs
This week, the APBA has begun to send out recall information and cardboard mailing boxes to registered pug owners, who are asked to place their '07 pug inside the box, seal it, and, if they wish, punch air holes in the top and sides. Owners must then put the box inside an airtight heavy-duty plastic bag, affix a postage-paid mailing label, and drop it off at any U.S. post office.
In order to ensure that all '07 pugs are taken out of circulation, the organization is also providing a complimentary on-site disposal service to pug owners who are otherwise unable to participate in the recall.
"We'd prefer to destroy all units here at our headquarters—we already have the chimneys going day and night," McAndrews said. "But the very young and the very old seem rather reluctant to send in their pugs, despite all of their well-documented flaws. To protect our reputation as pug breeders, we're going to spend the next month visiting individual homes and putting these dogs out of everyone's misery."
For Mason City, IA pug owner Lee Kraus, the APBA's announcement comes as a complete vindication after years of contending with defective pugs. In the past five years alone, Kraus has attempted to return three of the dogs to his local breeder, and each time has been denied either a refund or an exchange for a more reliable make, such as a Shih Tzu.
"I'm glad to see the APBA is finally taking responsibility for this disaster," Kraus said. "Governor Fattpants gave me insomnia with his constant snorting, and Boiler ruined my bedroom set when he went into total renal shutdown."
Cindy Anderson of the Sarasota, FL–based Pug Owners Group shares Kraus's frustration with the highly developed breed.
"After trying and failing to nurse Princess Kevin through hemorrhagic lupus and Boatsley through a hysterical tubal pregnancy, I don't know if I'll ever own another pug," Anderson said. "It's not worth the hassle."
"Oh, who am I kidding? They're just so cute!" she added. "I love their adorable snorting and their funny little waddle. We're going to call our next one Lopez."

14 comments:

Deb said...

AHHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHAHA

My Reflecting Pool said...

I love pugs. they are just sooooo adorable. I like that name Lopez. hmmmmm.

Sunrunner said...

Pugs are cute!!!

Matt-Man said...

That's a dog!!?

Crankster said...

"Governor Fattpants?" I'm dying.

My sister owns a bulldog. I'm not sure this story is really a joke.

Odat said...

deb, thank you very much for referring this to me!!! I don't know what'd I'd to without you!!
hehe.

Pool, I adore my pug and he's so much cuter than that pic! (p.s., don't pick Lopez!!)

Sun, they sure are!!!

Matt-man, oh hush!

Crankster, hiya! It is not far from the truth. As a matter of fact, I;m bringing my pug in today for a consult to have his nostrils widened, (at the recommendation from my vet), so he can breath better! I'll keep y'all posted how it turns out...;-)

SGT DUB said...

WEll, with names like "Governor" and "Princess Kevin" I can see why this isn't a strudy breed. Try, "Dog" like John Wayne did, "Bullet" like Roy Rogers, heck even Rin Tin Tin.

The CEO said...

What a cutie!

Matt said...

The gay community is not going to like this, ODAT.

Stop messing with gay dargs.

Dan said...

Poor babies. It's terrible when man breeds dog that are so prone to illness.

Odat said...

Sgt. Dub, Hey ..my lil snot dog's middle name is "killer"! ;-)

CEO, Yeah pugs are cute!!!

Matt! I don't have a "gay darg"...he's a "manly lil guy"...ahahaha.

Dan, Yes it is terrible. But I still love em!

Peace

Michael C said...

I've always though pugs were cool, the Vinnie Barbarino of the school, so to speak.

Malnurtured Snay said...

I understand the 2008 model will feature detachable teeth with rocket launchers and titanium claws for tactical engagements of multiple encroaching postmen.

Loving Annie said...

Whaaaaat ?????